Tuesday, January 02, 2007

New Year's Resolution

Ever since I was in college I've had these anxiety dreams where I have to go take a test and I never actually bought the book, or I had never gone to the class, and I don't even know where to go to take the test, but I know that I'm supposed to be there--prepared or not. Once I joined the military and went though basic training, the context of the anxiety dreams shifted to having to go back and redo Basic...knowing even in my dream that I had already successfully completed it.

Over the summer I had a dream where I had gotten a test back and discovered that I had aced it. I thought that signaled I was finally confident and knew what I was doing. That I was on the right path and could handle whatever came my way. I was sure that my anxiety dreams were over and I could sleep peacefully for the time being.

After I got put on this project at work and my stress level went through the roof, the dreams started creeping back in and then last night I hit a new low. I had my first anxiety dream about my new job and I've had enough.

So my goal for the new year is to let things affect me less. I'm not 100% sure what the solution is--more sleep? More booze? More exercise? But I'm certain that sleep and exercise will help. The trick will be finding the time for both activites, plus the time to get all my work done, but I'm committed to figuring out the right balance.

In fact balance is a better resolution for me to have. Balance between work and home. Balance between relaxing and exercise. Balance between nourishing my body and enjoying the occasional dessert. Balance between DH and myself.

So here's to a balanced 2007.
May she hold a lot less anxiety for us all!